A Candle In The Wind

Lost and forlorn
Encompassed in darkness
A lonely soul
trying to stay afloat
against the gales of time
survival so vital
destined to glow
While the vile wind blows
am a candle
Harbinger of hope
dispelling gloom
while dream flowers bloom
Vigilant till the first ray of sun
Spent, my work is done.

by Meena Iyer

Comments (5)

The analogy of the 'candle in the wind' has been well brought out.. Even frail objects like candles - which are symbols of self-sacrifice - can offer bright beams of hope to despairing souls, while spending themselves in that effort. A mixed metaphor has been resorted to in the phrase 'stay afloat against the gales'. Although many a great poet in the past had employed such mixed metaphors freely, perhaps substituting the word 'afloat' with 'alight' would be more in the fitness of things. Your technical background has not reduced the fertility of your poetic talent and I am sure you will carve a niche for yourself in the field of poetry in the not too distant a future. My hearty congratulations.
you fight all night to keep the dreams alive, yet are spent when the sun comes to the rescue. so life is in the struggle, that is the job at hand. thought provoking
meena, poet is a candle with both ends burning! *10*****
images brilliant, meena...'afloat' ok...for not getting drowned or not getting blown to pieces, the only possible way is to try float hither and thither in stormy gale...you have arrived on PH scene...congrats 10
Nice thought well expressed. If u don't mind...one thing i would like to say the words 'say afloat...' may not fit into this poem. Sorry if my comments offend u. with regards, sathya narayana