A Painful Love
Poem By Donna Nimmo
If I became crippeled or maimed
Would I have your love or just your pity?
Would you cherish and take care of me?
Or would you put me in a nursing home?
And go on with your life, as if I never existed
I would never want your, pity only your love
If I should ever become that way, just let me die
Your love so cruel, hardly ever a touch
In my time of need, when I love you so much
You turn away from me, as if a polite stranger
But it must be love, because I feel no danger
You don't beat me or abuse me, so it's got to be love
There is no tenderness or any understanding
Just day to day living as two polite strangers
I love you I do, my heart beats only for you
Is our love just so hopeless or is there a chance
That we can find our way back to each other again
Sleeping in the same bed so lonely and cold
If loneliness could kill I'd already be dead
Am I not worthy of your love as i once was?
You break my heart over and over again
You can't even see the pain I endure
The pain of the awful silence when we are together
Can't talk to you all alone with my pain
You say if you didn't love me, I wouldn't be here
But if I left I wouldn't be missed or looked for
My heart is dying inside, and you can't even see
So once more I love for nothing in return
Why do I try so hard to make you love me?
So i'll not leave, live without love just companionship
I'll pretend everythings ok, and love won't matter anymore
You didn't even know when I died inside
Going through the motions of acting alive
I feel such great pain over so much from the past
You can't see the many scars I carry inside
You weren't there, their buried deep in my mind
I don't blame you if you don't want to love me
I wouldn't want to love me either!