Agonizing Reapraisal

I wrote a note to myself that scared myself in a way that no one else could
I told me truth that needed no proof
I saw myself as I didnt want to see myself the way that always I should
Like a backwards dream that shimmers and seems like a parady of itself
And now I see the truth, like a rancid and aching tooth that I can't pull out by myself
The truth of me is painful to see, and there is no one to blame for it but me
I wasted my days by imaginary quays beside an imaginary sea
And if I could come back, I would paint it all black,
because thats the only color I can see.

by Wilfred Owen Bitner

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