And The Little Piggy Went Wee, Wee, Wee, All The Way Home
He said he could not stand her accent,
by Ruth Walters
her giggle was just like a drill
and would she refrain from her droning
as the subject was making him ill.
She looked at him sweetly and smiled,
tipped up the soup on his lap
and just as the waiter came over
the restaurant all started to clap.
Then she told him his suit was quite aging,
his trousers were tight at the crotch,
his bad breath was melting the candles,
and the touch of his hand was too rough.
The little pigs face went quite grey then,
his ego had shrivelled and gone,
so he got up and ran as little pigs can
and went wee, wee, wee,all the way home.