Blaming You Doesn'T Get Me Very Far

Poem By beautiful imperfection

I can't get this off my mind and it's tearing me up,
I try to let go but it all comes crashing back again.
I try to deny how I feel towards you,
I try to ignore the pain,
but I can't pretend it's not there anymore.

I know you love me, and I know it's not my fault,
but it's hard to get that knowledge into my broken heart.
I try to blame you for everything I feel,
I try to say it's you who ripped me apart,
but in my heart, I know that's a lie.

I let the drama in my life come before God,
and that caused me lots of pain,
I tried to blame it on you,
to keep myself from going insane,
but it only made things worse.

Now I see that the pain I felt was self-inflicted,
it was all my fault,
I was looking for happiness in all the wrong places,
meanwhile keeping my feelings locked in a vault,
which only resulted in a meltdown...or two...or three...

Now I see the truth, but I'm fighting within,
I still want to blame you for everything I feel
and ignore the truth
I know is real:
I still love you.

Comments about Blaming You Doesn'T Get Me Very Far

Wow another great one i can relate to this 10+++
Typo in third stanza's fourth line? I believe you mean 'going'. I hope you can forgive yourself. Not for the typo, for that is insignificant, but for the pain you have inside for what you have gone through. The first step in forgiving anyone is forgiving yourself.

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