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Poems
Burn A Row House For Christ
PPH (1996-1920 / )

Burn A Row House For Christ

Poem By Professor Poetry Hound

Our congregation is having problems with some very
annoying neighbors. They’re always complaining that
we take up all the parking spots on Sunday. We tell
them we need those spots for people coming to
church for spiritual rejuvenation. After all, we’re
doing the Lord’s bidding, unlike them. Why can’t
they sacrifice their parking spots for a few hours?
Jesus sacrificed a lot more than that.

Speaking of Jesus, I know he’s on our side. But I wish
he would get off his duff and do something about
these bothersome neighbors. They’re all heathen
sinners anyway, so it’s not like it would be a big deal
if their houses burned down. I think our church
maintenance staff must have some kerosene lying
around. We could just tell the police that the fires
were the will of God.

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Comments (6)

'For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, ' declares the Lord.' Isaiah 55: 8. It's a good thing God doesn't listen to our suggestions. Otherwise, everyone would have perished long ago.
Thus saith the Lord your God, 'Love thy neighbor enough to barbeque them.'
I laughed and laughed. How often I have wanted to burn out the neighbors! But we never do. You're obviously a fine Christian to relent.
Religion, sometimes thy name is, in truth, hypocrisy!
I used to live accross from a church and, man, they had the most un Christian attitude to parking spaces. They'd even park in my driveway. Till I figured if I started killing them, I could blame it on Satan... Hugs Anna xxx


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