Cheating On My Wife [ Revised ]

Poem By james d nall,jr

When your clothes came off, I was stunned
Couldn't believe you wanted to have some fun
Breathless I fell asleep with you
Really thought you did the same, too
What a surprise was I in for
When you handcuffed me and opened the door
A film crew ran in with lights in my face
Laughing you said I was being put in my place
Flipped me over with a whip in your hand
What was happening I didn't understand
What a surprise was I in for
You beat me and asked if I wanted more?
Never had nothing happened like this in my life
Then in through the door walked my wife
Dressed up like a bad dominitrix
I knew I was gonna suffer some tricks
What a surprise was I in for
You treated me worse than a whore
She told me this was the end of my cheating
Right after she gave me one hell of a beating
Striped my ass from head to my feet
Told me the next time, I'd be more than beat
Out came a tube of Super Glue
Unfortunately, I knew what you were gonna do
Glued my best friend to my inner thigh
To standing urination, I said goodbye
Next day the maid walked into the room
Opening the drapes got rid of the gloom
Saw me on the bed and a whip on the floor
Said ' Senor', you need a little more'
Beat my ass and left me crying
Called the cops and told 'em I was dying
What a surprise was I in for
They came and kicked down the door
Laughing so hard they pissed their britches
While the whole time I'm calling them sonsofbitches
What a surprise was I in for!

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