Poem Hunter
PPH (1996-1920 / )


Poem By Professor Poetry Hound

Isn’t it frustrating how Muslims say you’ll go to hell
if you’re not a Muslim and Christians say you’ll go
to hell if you’re not a Christian? There’s no way to win.
You just have to gamble that you choose the right
door. Maybe religions that don’t believe in hell, like
Judaism and Buddhism, are the way to go. But that’s
no good either because if you’re Jewish, you get
accused of all sorts of cockamamie conspiracies, and
if you’re Buddhist you could get reincarnated as a clam.
Reincarnation is like a big lottery. You could come back
as a Republican, which means you’d have to mouth off
all the time about creationism and gays. That’s a case
where God would probably regard suicide favorably.

User Rating: 3,5 / 5 ( 3 votes ) 7

Comments (7)

Come to think of it, maybe Karma will bring back all poets as clams so they'll just shut up. Buddha recommended that. On the other hand, I'm glad you got this gem out before you (or I) had to reincarnate. Maybe it's best to reserve judgement until forced to make a choice. Plato said that right after the choice of our next lifetime was made (Odysseus wanted to be a bird) we're given a draught of forgetfulness. Just as well. The followers of Sri Chaitanya say that if you say 'Krishna' even once, it improves your chances of a better future life. I say 'Hare Krishna' from time to time. Who knows? I loved this.
Correction required PH, crap shot with spellings...smiling at you, Tai. Your views on religion PH, seems to be obsessed with gays. Are you trying to come out or what? lol Crapshots are everywhere it seems! Tai
Hey Prof, I have strongly held views which can be considered both leftish and rightish, but I gotta tell you my rightish side thinks this is hilarious. Some of those from both sides need to clam up from time to time. Read a good book called 'Ain't nobodys business if you do'. Basically says that we should do whatever we want as long as we don't harm the person or property of another person. Well Prof, have a good day from the right..er..left..oh hell, whatever I am. Keep them coming.
this will come as no surprise, but i laughingly agree with every single word in this piece. i'd rather come back as a clam than a Republican anyway. Jake
Why not choose hinduism, u will be judged on ur deeds during ur lifetime.