Desire

Do not tell me that you are happy-
I do not wish to hear it,
Though it be the one thing I have ever desired for you.

Do not tell me, because I know that my desire is mocked by your happiness.
Without me,
You are happy,
As you could not be, were you with me.
That thought,
That feeling,
That loneliness,
Kills me,
Leaving me cold, and alone.
I wish for you to be happy.
-This my true desire-
But I also hate being alone.
What desire, then? What do I fulfill?
My love for you demands one,
Yet my own love for myself,
Loved of none other,
Demands another.
Be happy, love. But do not tell me of it,
Because in telling me of it,
You tell me that I have failed my own quest for myself,
And that I am the only reason I am alone.

by James Grengs

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