Do I Need A Wife

Poem By Eziudo Michael Nwachukwu

If I needed my cloths and dishes washed
I'd buy me a washing machine and dishwasher
I'd treat them like gold and polish them fine
And give them all the detergents they'd need and provide constant power too
And never overwork them
Never forgetting to service them without them calling for it
And they'd serve me well
So I ask myself
Do I need a wife?

If I needed a cook
I'd higher a caterer and a baker or more
Supported by the househelp and domestic servants
They'd prepare me delicious meals and pastries of my choice
I'd provide them accommodation and befitting payment and welfare packages
And grant them leaves and vacations
And make them look neat and healthy at all times
And they'd serve me well
So I ask myself
Do I need a wife?

If I wanted a company
I'd get a slay queen and or a girlfriend
And she'd walk me to clubs and parties and meetings
We'd take selfies and groupies
And visit places on trips and vacations
We'd talk sex and feel romance
I'd spoil her and care for her and make her
And the company she'd give would be comforting
As her attention for me at the times I'd need her won't be divided
So I'd ask myself
Do I need a wife?

If it's just to satisfy my libido alone
I'd get a fleshlight for myself
Like them girls would get a dildo
And it'd take care of me
It would only cost me time of cleaning and the cost of batteries
But my sex drive would be a gone need
And where technology takes care of everything
Wife too won't be difficult to clone
So I ask myself
Do I need a wife?

And if I want the laughters and cries of children
I'd go for adoption
Or get a surrogate mother
And oh, incubator could be there too
And I'll handle them as agreed
And the testament would be our stand
And if I'd go beyond
It's for love and acceptance' sake
And I'll get my kids jumping on me
In due time
So I ask myself
Do I need a wife?

Yes, everything is available to take care of everything
Yet yes I need a wife
One I won't buy with money for understanding and emotional needs
One before whom I'd not be scared to make mistakes and still be myself
Taking me in her whole arms despite my flaws
In whose breasts I can lie and cry as a weakened man
And before morning she'd strengthened me up
And one to learn with and walk with and grow with
One that can go into my secrecy and privacy with me
One that can stand to be me when I'm not there
She alone can be my manager
And my help
Others may go and find their ways when things aren't right
But wife would stay
Others would need servicing and balancing and unconcerned pleasing
And teaching and grooming
Wife would fit in
Do I need a wife?

Oh I do need a wife
Wife can look at my face and get a thousand answers
She can tell when my smile is faked
And know how to get it real
She'd be here and there with me
And never will complain of overworked
Or used and dumped
Do I need a wife

Of course I do
For those kids would need a person to call mother
And it would be true to the fact
And I too need a soulmate, a partner and a friend
A company to before God
And a more reason for success
The rhetoric irony becomes
Do I need a wife

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