The fact that you wear a moustache
and float around with much panache
does not make you into the Kaiser
nor would it see you any wiser
so stop pretending little man
wipe off your grin with the false tan
for, if you think yours does not smell
then in your mind you are not well.
Come see me when you have a chance
but pay your fee well in advance.
as otherwise I get annoyed
my name is Doctor Sigmund Freud.