LA (June 8,1991 / Toronto)

Don't Let Me Go

The sunlight in my winter
Has followed me to spring
I admit I thought by now we'd waver
But with you I'd still rather be.

No one else seems to warm me
Or bring wonders to my world.
Instead, they rather destroy me
Trying to keep me bound to earth

It's as if new eyes have been given to me
A gift of sight, of the old life I was leading.
All I desired was to drink all day and night,
But now I see there's much more to happiness
With the right company inspired by my side

The dreams are limitless
And adventure rings true
Dancing through new doorways and windows
A different heaven than I ever knew

A road trip to New Orleans
Opened skies to jazzy tales
Singing karaoke and laughing down the street
Hearing the cries of the bluesy lies

For the first time I get to be just who I've always been
Not a second thought of what dress I should wear today
Or who I aim to please
Happiness comes just a little too easy
It'll bring me to my knees.

It'll bring me to my knees.
All I have is to let it be.
Let it run its course as it does naturally.
What a dangerous and reckless thing to associate happiness with another human being.
For the first time I have something to lose,
At any given time my happiness can walk away and leave.

I'm so far away from anything I know.
I can't remember how I was so happy to be alone.
Now all I think about is the future and dreams coming true.
All I think about is making new and exciting memories alongside with you.

Alone with the radio and hot coffee just brewed
I realize I am my own worst nightmare come to life.
I am scared and don't know what to do about it.
I am not in control anymore, and I know you wont hurt me,
But it's still a foreign wasteland that I find myself lost in
That I just want to sit down and surrender entirely
To whatever pull it is that is tugging at my soul.

This wasn't the deal I made,
This isn't how it's supposed to go.
And while I know I'm not who you want or need,
Dear god please, please, please
do not let me go.

It's selfish,
I know,
I just cannot, cannot let you
let me go.

by Leah Ayliffe

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