Earthbound Angels: Doubting Angel

From Sun Flower Sutra of Siddhartha Gautama
to Moses at Mount Sinai
to the Nazarene's sermon on the mount
to Mohammed's vision
hearing the echoing of the Ram's Horn
calling me to light candles
for the Sabbat
to partake of the Seder
to atone for my sins
to await the coming of Elijah
His chair left empty
the door opened to welcome Him in
in my doubt the promised land
is denied to me.
Wandering from Guru to Guru
drifting in & out of temples & churches
praying to one God
praying to a host of Gods
denying any & all Gods
in an age of the Spiritual Smorgasbord
like a child set free in a candy store
is there anything there to offer
more than momentary pleasure
like drowning men
grabbing onto anything
something just to ease the mind
something just to ease the pain
or just more junk food for the imagination
to keep us busy
to see the world through rose-colored glasses

It's all spread out before us
spooky spiritual cults & clubs to join
selling Gods & religious relics
to decorate your homes
big exotic books to lay on your coffee table
to show how profound you really are.

'Don't worry, give yourself to God'
one Guru says while another
says give yourself to meditation
to the Buddha or Krishna
or to a meaningless Mantra
& ignore the world
for its all an illusion anyway
your fears/ your pain/ your poverty
your hunger & the poor in the streets
your greed/your lust/ your sins
your Mercedes & your Condo
your selfishness/your avarice
your back stabbing & your cowardice
you can resolve it all in an hour of Meditation
or after a deep massage
dismissing it all
as the turn of the Karmic Wheel
as God's Will & what will be will be
all action is dubious by nature
tinkerings in the Karmic Machinery
just go Yogic Flying
sing gently to your giant mushrooms
listen to your astrologer
read Tarot cards & tea leaves
contact your personal angel
your spiritual friend
& your familiar spirit
go astral traveling
or table rapping
see forms of ectoplasm
take shape in the ether
as you fast yourself into delirium
chant til the world begins to spin
as angels & demons of your own making
begin to appear
tossing your Rune Stones & Yarrow Sticks
or three coins to read the' I Ching'
drawing Pentagrams on the floor
using a little of you & your friends blood
to summon foul smelling Demons
just for the Hell of it
for some excitement & entertainment
in the end turning Gold into Led-

by gordon coombes

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