Exchange Of An Unsuitable Pet

In a little family group they stood
Aggrieved on the petshop floor.
“It bit me and me mam and our Gladys,
And ‘im, that boy by the door”.

The ferret dangled like a dishcloth,
Totally in disgrace
And listened appalled as its sins and shortcomings
Were paraded in front of its face.

The petshop assistant was doubtful, and said
They’d had it as a kitten,
And neither customer or staff
Had it ever bitten.

But when she’d seen the scars and scratches
On Gladys’s hands and face
She said they might have another ferret
To take the miscreant’s place.

“No thanks, no way”, they said, as one,
“We’ll have a different pet,
Something soft, preferably toothless,
Anything but a ferret”!

They humm’d and haw’d and messed about
With many a poke and dig
And finally chose in exchange for their ferret
A gormless guinea pig.

by Pete Crowther

Comments (4)

Wonderful! Wonderful! That was a good fun one. Sincerely Ernestine
Peter, this dear little rhyming poem doesn't sound like you, except that is extremely well-written and very funny. I can picture the whole scene...and I loved the irony at the end. Raynette
Cute and funny. I returned a pair of peached face pigeons to a pet shop once (that's a good line for a poem) . I thought they would be lovely beautiful pets but they made such a terrible noise. I had to wear thick leather gloves to clean the cage because they bit and clawed. I don't like caged birds any more. Kind regards Gypsy
I love a poem that makes me giggle at the end. I love this one because I laughed. Thanks Peter.