Fading

The batteries of powder as they drive
Through a clearing; have and have not survive
A tale of tempest and tempest’s tale
Telling of the trees that stood when the winds prevail
In ghostly silence but to dreams forgetting
All the mind gains and loses on awakening
Words to the thoughts of worlds and dreams
Imprints of mental grammar on invisible reams
Any many way-too-may faces, facsimile
To torment in sub-real anomaly
Locked into a chamber of half-scribbled cognizance
Manipulates the power…of palpable ignorance
To the unknown man, persona unknown
The solitude, pity, and bliss alone
Tightrope walking, miles above imaginary verandas
Lets the drive too close in coming for the pretender
Coasting through waves, unquestioning surrender
Circling the fleeing thoughts trapped in rotundas
As they whirl in dervish shades of absinthe
They float within, and mourn the absence
Of hope, of love, and pools
To return unto perpetual forgetting.

by Hunter Hansen

Comments (2)

I get the message you are trying to get across. Be careful with those adjectives again in this one. You lost your flow a bit. Well done.
Hunter, two crits.. watch repetition of words (eg. unknown) and get rid of dots in line 12 - unnecessary. Otherwise, the poem works and you have a developing craft that you should be proud of. Ms. Elata is quite incorrect. S.