S ( / NYC)

For You The One Who Says You Understand

this is for you and you know who you are
you say you know how I feel
you say you went throw the same thing
you say I remind you of you
well guess what I’m not you
I am me
for you don't know me
not the real me
I’ve kept that hidden
hidden from all
for so long
I kept it inside
locked up tight
so don't say you know me
you know how I feel
cause when you do
all I can do is laugh
for there is so much you don't know
for you don't know the real me
and you never will
for you say to trust you and tell you all
I told you more than I should have
for you say you will not tell anyone
but then you email me saying I should tell her
tell my mom
I say no for she is never to know
you say ok
you say you won't tell her
unless you think my life is in danger
well I have news for you
my life will always be in danger
for I live on the edge
and always will
for I like it there
I don't find comfort in being 'safe'
for it just makes me worry
worry about all the possible things that could happen
that could go wrong
for you know you can never be happy for to long
so I stay on the edge I don't feel safety
but I don't worry either
I feel comforted
for I now where I am
I know where I stand
I know who stands there with me
no one that is
for I stand alone in this battle
and guess what
I’m learning to like that
for I am independent
more than I can say for you
and those you say to look up to
to open up to
well I never will
for they will all never know
as long as you keep your promise
which I know you won't
you see I will never make that mistake again
you know the one
the one called trust
never again will I try that again
for I am now battling with what is inside
for I have won the outer battle
you just don't know yet
for I have a plan
a plan to get away from you all
to be independent
totally alone
but yet at the same time not a lone
for I will be with someone who to has part of them locked inside
for he is the only one that can say I know how you feel
for he to deals with the battle inside
I just started mine
and for I believe his is almost over
so I will have to hurry
and tame the demons with in
for I know what they want
they want to come out and play
and right about now
I’m thinking I might just let them
let them come out and play
of course I will have to put a leash on them
but the question is will they break that chain will they break that leash
for then I will have no control over them
they will totally be free
free to be out
free to do what they really want to
cause all the things they crave
and revenge
for soon I will let them out
out to play
and we shall just have to wait and see
see if they are strong enough to break my chain

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