TJ (17th June 1958 / England)

Goodbye Edith

Awkward silence
Darkened room
Drapes drawn
Hearse soon

Sombre suits
Best plates
Small talk
All wait

Limo leaving
Glad to go
Bentley black
Stately, slow

Short service
Production line
For eighty years
So little time

Silent tears
Family, friends
Life remembered
At its end

Ashes scattered
A final goodbye
By your beloved
Forever to lie.

User Rating: 5,0 / 5 ( 1 votes ) 2

Comments (2)

A life wrapped around a few lines, and so succintly presented. We picture the scenes as the vivid rhymes lead us in this sad tribute.
Concise and to the point, the brevity of the verses conveys the sadness of the occasion and I feel I should add my commiserations as this is obviously/apparently someone known to you? Strangely, the brevity of the verses which need no other words to supplement the emotion behind them, reminds me of the way Twila Paris wrote 'Runner'. Why write several words when two or three will suffice? I must learn how to do that!