Heartbreaker

i look at you and when i do it breaks my heart.
it breaks for you, looking for something you cant have in the way you need it
and it breaks for me, seeing everything i want and need rights before me but unable to accept it
the blame for the break lays solely on myself.
you're perfect, a strong and caring man who has no business loving a wretched mess of a woman like me.
but if you see something in me worth your high esteem and precious affection than it must be there.
sometimes i wonder if the tender loving heart in you breaks also.
i pray that it remains in tact, held together by the bond of hope and patience that i see so abundant in you.
i love that about you
cling to that hope and remain patient for me.
will you wait?
could you wait?
i question myself and what we are, i wonder if it would work, and im afraid to hurt you, i couldnt bare it if i hurt you.
i sometimes lag behind, but i do find my way in the end.
i know i love you, but i must prove it to myself first before i can show it to you.
be content with the love between us now and i will struggle to do the same.
and we will both be the better for it, spending the time refining ourselves for the other.
and we will walk into that sunset of our friendship hand in hand and begin the day anew as more than we have been before.

by Lily Faust

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Comments (1)

This touches on a number of valuable lessons... each (like everyone of us) a work in progress. Great write, Lily! Brian