SM (March 29,1990 / Sunny California)

Hey Stranger, Hey Dad

If there was a way to go back in time would you take the chance?
If you could change the past would you do it?
If I've never have met you in my life, would I still feel the gaping hole as deep as I feel it now?

There's times that my world revolves around the non existent memory of you.
At times I curse the fact that we share the same blood, at times I cry myself to sleep missing you.
At times I wish I was your little girl, but that chance has flown bye.
At times I regret knowing you, meeting you, and trying to find a way for you to notice me.
Yet, there's times I'm grateful I have a few memories of you, a few relics to remember you by, a few cherished moments spent with you.

It's been too many long years with out you, yet the pain is never enough to keep me from hoping I see you soon, hoping I might have the chance to know you, hoping that perhaps some day we can have a father-daughter bond.
It's a futile childish dream that I can't rid myself of.

The time still passes on and months have turned to years, how funny you only seem to remember me, when the rest of the world has forgotten you...
It's not fair to be hung up on a man who never was, never has been and probably will never be my father.
But I can't help myself from wanting and yearning a little affection, a little attention, a little love of which I've been denied my entire life.

I've always had a surrogate dad, never a father figure.
He raised me well and did his best, but that was never enough.
I've still felt like my life was missing a part of the puzzle, that piece is you.
Maybe someday I can fill in the gap in my heart or maybe someday you can become a part of my life, maybe one day you can complete the puzzle of my life...

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Comments (1)

i really felt for you reading your poem wonderful showing of emotions! !