I Deserve Better

I am breaking apart.
I can no longer hold on to strings.
I've done my time, now it's time to go back.
The ones that use to look to me for Happiness,
can now find another smiley person.
Half of my smiles are gone,
decomposing somewhere in the wind.

Life has become more complicated,
and my feelings are mixed up all over the place.
Simple words can hurt me within a second;
Disappointment has become my new best friend.
Trust now is the big question
and Love has no more options.
I am tired of the pains that I take for no gains.

Friends will come and go,
but the ones that are worth it will stay.
Support, I won't need
I'll learn to take care of myself.
Siblings... what good are they?
We never get along.
And Parents...
what can you say?
You don't even know about half of the things I've been through.

I am on my own,
no matter how ugly that sounds.
I must learn to sustain myself
and I must learn to crawl back on my feet.
Drugs won't do a thing,
alcohol is only good for a few hrs.
Then Darkness continues to hit me in the face,
my Shinning Armor is taken out of place.

The role I will play, I know
will involve a lot of battles.
But this War I must fight,
to prove that I deserve much better.

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