I Don'T Bother

I look into the mirror, ashamed of what I see.
I'm looking at the face of someone I don't want to be.

I stare into the glass and I have this continuous urge to break it.
I don't like what I see in there, but for now I guess I'll fake it.

It looks like I've been losing weight, (Yeah right, I'm way too fat) .
It looks like I am prettier, (Oh, don't get me started on that) .

I've gotten a little bit taller, (Whatever, I think I'm shrinking) .
My stomach's a little bit smaller, (Yea, but only when I'm not breathing)

I think I'm getting a figure, (Ha, I'm not even growning) .
I think I've lost my baby fat, (No, it's there, it's just not showing) .

I've noticed I've been smiling, (But that doesn't mean it's real)
Oh, look, my hair is longer, (Whatever, no big deal) .

For all the things I notice, I see something that is wrong.
I dont like the things I see, I don't like who I've become.
And everytime I find something that I think I like,
The cycle starts all over, So I dont bother to try.

by Crystal Johnson

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Comments (2)

Please keep trying, I'm certain you're a beautiful young lady! ! It is you that matters, not the TV commercials! ! I always believe there is no one more valuable than you! !
Crystal, You are beautiful! And the sooner you see that what you're feeling isn't your fault, the sooner you will be able to heal and move forward with your life. It's so sad to think you feel this way. Love, Mary