JS (12/04/1989 / Dublin, Ireland)

I'M A Monster (Thank You And Goodnight)

The tiny robin sitting on the railroad tracks can't even see the train.
O forgiving dust particle.
O bleak supernova.
To the words 'Best Friend',
Being reshaped, reformed by the keys of the cyberspace piano.
It's an orchestra.
To the f*cking idiot who shoots his friends then wonders why he's alone,
Wandering streets;
Whispers to a carnal beach.
Dead skin flakes and flows to the wind.
If the living dead blows his own f*cking brains out in the middle of a forest,
Does anyone care if they hear it?

O upturned social world.
To the friendless people,
We are all alone together and never, amen.
I should've been a sea urchin
Or something that grows inside your veins that slowly breaks you down.
If i find what it is that makes you hurt, I promise
Not to destroy it but to hide it inside myself for so long as you believe it's gone
Then when I am bored enough to want to make you cry
I'll use it against you.
I wish you would...
I'll watch you die.

Nails bitten down to the f*cking bone.
You never answer.
Tonight won't ever make a difference
Cos I'm a monster.
If you leave I'll promise to hate you forever
The only promise I can ever keep.
O empty sidewalk.
O dying lamp-post.
I'll watch my reflection in the car windscreen
A collision to be expected.
To the birds
I am left.
The sky was always broken.
The giant crack where I slipped through.
This collision was expected.
The message on the inside on my egg shell skull reads broken finger nails
Down to the f*cking bone; A message that breathes two hours late for the party or the broken
Glass fragments of someone's cheap perfume; Or the grown up perception of growing up; Or the getting over it modernistic idea of friendship; or the tire mark scratching, plastic bag tearing
On my chest; Or the note, really a napkin, forgotten to a coffee table on some lost coast that reads, 'I waited for years and you never showed.
I left you this note just in case;
Just so you would know.
This ship sailed tonight
Without you ever being told.
I ordered you a drink,
Just that, right?
My shirts and ties are packed in a promise,
This ship is in open water; I'm packed to go.
So I'm writing this note just to let you know,
That I'm never going to see you again.'
This ship it sails till it hits on the rocks;
This ship made it farther back when...
O broken trellis
O rotten weed
To the cat's bloodied corpse housed by a wren.
To the forgotten note that flutters, caught by a breeze:
To the sand, to the cracked sky leads, to the long drowned sea, it goes on; it reads,
'World without end. Amen.'

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Pablo Neruda

If You Forget Me

Comments (1)

second stanza...are you two still friends? nice write.