I Miss You Friend

Its been so long
But somehow i stayed strong
I miss our 8 hour phone calls
Our stupid trips to the mall
Our laughs and cries
Our hugs goodbye
We were always together
Where there was one, there was the other
You stayed with me til my tears dried
You told me that my feelings were not something i should hide
You made me believe in myself
You brought me back from hell
I always felt i was blessed
And i was never left with any regrets
We were closer than any sister could ever get
The best person id ever met
I thought we would be friends for the rest of our lives
But when i got that text it was the worst shock of my life
I think i actually laughed thinking it was a joke
My heart instantly broke
I was smiling on the outside
But on the inside
A part of me had just died
I got in my car and came home and cried
I went into shock for a while
I couldnt even pretend to smile
I came out of shock and cried harder than ever
All the pain from the memories i remembered
For 2 days not coming out of my room for anything
The feeling of you still lingering
I barely talked for weeks
I missed you more than anyone could ever speak
I lost my best friend, my sister
Everyday i miss her
I started drinking
Dug a hole deeper and started sinking
I became an alcoholic because i couldnt handle it
The pain was a bottomless pit
My friends watched in pity as i nearly drank myself to death
I had nothing left
Always drunk so i wouldnt have to deal
It was taking much too long to heal
I spiraled out of control
With a broken soul
And a shattered heart
The cutting became an art
Deeper and deeper each time
Always pretending i was fine
I think i will eventually be ok
But not today
I miss you still
I always will
Just want you to know something true
You broke my heart but i forgive you
I still love and miss you
One day maybe it will be set right
But until then i fall asleep every night
Knowing that youre not in my life anymore
So goodbye friend
Maybe someday we could start over again

by lindsay stone

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