CA ( / Poetry Hell, Vermont)

In A Bind (An Ode To The Wedgie)

I've got a wedgie
Riding up my crack
I'd pull it out
But first must look back.

Alas, there are folks
Down the corridor walking
If I fix it now
They would surely be talking

So into my office
For privacy divine
Is this still a wedgie
Or a freakin' clothesline?

But then my boss pops in
For a long meeting
I had to just grin
While my ass took a beating.

I hope he didn't think
The faces I made
Meant his talk was a stink
Or got my review a poor grade.

What? ! Now I'm fired!
So 'clean out the desk'
First I'll unpack my mess
Before I do the rest.

Yeah, I'll clean out my 'drawers' and -
Wait a second! Where's it gone?
My boxers have vanished
Something is wrong!

So I beg of you
I'm down on my knees
If I just bend over
Will you pull it out please?

Just be careful!
Whatsoever you do
Cause yesterday's pair
Might be in there too!

by Chuck Audette

Comments (10)

Your mind is a wonder Who knows how it works. It' full of all manner of spazms and quirks. I doubt if there's danger, although any day the men in the white coats may take you away!
I'm wiggling and walking I'm so full of wind Come out brown for talking My undies get binned
Chuck, I was going to make a comment here, but, I don't feel remiss, I paid attention to my senses, No, I'm not touching this! B.V.A.
Wedgie atomic style! Ass-tounding and turd-rific! I see you've been the butt of many a joke in your BVD (Buried Very Deep) briefs, you cheeky wee monkey. Cheers, Greg
Painfully funny. Better off going commando. Oh, hang on, you might lose your trousers! Ez
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