SJM ( / )

In Praise Of One Most Barberous

Stood there in his emporium
Where noble heads offered up their cranium
For which he did apply
The towel, lather and with thumb, decry
That plumage that grows upon
The best and worst of renown
Sometimes just a bit of tuft.
Other's having far too much.

Regardless, as they fall under this master of
Facial hairs made most soft,
Some claim it is the razor most important,
While others deride such thought for a moment.
As it is the honing of the blade
That makes it glide across the plane
Through the lather, thick and thin
Applied by this master of the chin.

Perhaps the soap could be the secret
As each hair is soaked most discrete.
Yet as all who have shaved before,
Is know that prior to being shorn,
To the face warm and wet
Are to be applied as yet,
Another towel steaming from the bricks
Laid upon the harbinger of bristly sticks.
Only then can the suds
Wet and soften the daily hubris.

So stood that master of the chin
Who by advertising created a paper din
With poems, essays and claims of regal being
Sir John Richard Desborus Huggins became the first, with feeling,
To apply the grease to the skids
That became known as advertising blitz.

Famous, he was for sure
Not just for the barberous blade to be endured
But for his advertising might
That brought men and women day and night
To his ‘emporium' of treasures,
Fine perfumes, oils, salves, pearls, wigs and other measures.
Sold them all at a small profit (according to him)
But judging from his prices; his memory dim.
Nevertheless, famous men must be shaved
By this master of the cup and blade.

And for the ladies, far and wide
(not their dimensions, save their pride) ,
Came for wigs and other things most proper,
Necessary for the fair one, a fashion shopper.

Huggins in a most barberous tone
Set the stage for advertising, all alone.
So the next time that you remove hair or whisker,
Remember the admonition of this Master.
Name recognition is the reason -
For customers being there in every season!

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