(01/19/1990 / Houston, TX)

It Begins

I can barely recall their names anymore. It's so hard to see her face. I slowly crouch on the ledge of the 20 story building as I look down on the people below. They have no idea I am there, no idea I exist. guess it doesn't matter. I don't want to be known after all. I prefer to live in the shadows, to only be seen that moment before their life drains from them. To see the darkness claim them as the last bit of light fades from their eyes. That is all that matters now. Ever since they were taken from me.

I gently scratch my head as the rain begins to poor. Who was taken from me again I wonder. I grit my teeth as I focus harder. My head begins to ache as blackness clouds my vision. Suddenly a flash of blood and screams appear, an alley and 3 bodies. I'm holding a young girl, singing her a lullaby as she fades from this world. Then hatred, so much hatred as I now find myself standing in front of a door.

The door is barred by many chains and locks. I put them there so very long ago, to keep it all in. They could never see what was behind the door. I loved my family too much for them to see that. But now they were all gone. Now they had been taken from me. So now, since all I loved was ripped from me I could finally open the door.

I simply raised my hand and touched the lock in the center. The door shuddered and the chains strained. I felt tears burn my eyes as I could still see their faces, hear their cries, and feel my little sister grow cold in my arms. I look up at this door, this prison I built to house it all.

I cock my fist back and with all the power I can summon I drive it into the lock. There is no pain as my fist contacts the barbed metal. No fear as the chains turn to ash and the door shudders once more. The door bursts open and the blackness flows out, like a black and choking fog it slowly surrounds me, testing me.

Suddenly it drowns me. I feel it all come back in a second. The hatred burns away at my flesh while the pain breaks away my mind and the misery strangles the hope out of my soul. All of fills me as the blackness drags me down the very depths of insanity. But I don't care anymore as my body and mind are wracked with incomprehensible pain.

The darkness fades and there I am with my beloved little sister in my arms. But I'm no longer what I was a moment ago. I am what I never wanted my family to see. The mask I have worn for over a decade lays shattered at my side. And then the laughter starts.

I laugh at how I am now free. I laugh at the horrors I am about to inflict on the ones who released me. But mostly I laugh because this little girl's dead corpse just looks too funny. I can't remember who she is but I don't care either. As I drop her to the dirty ground I look at those trembling in front of me and smile a blood soaked smile.

It is time for me to finally make you feel what I know, I exclaim as I pull out a blade I had strapped to my thigh. And as I drag it vertically across the skin near my eyes I shudder and let the blood flow down into my mouth. I lick the blade clean then giggle softly as I ready myself for the slaughter.

I am free now and now I will finally be able to slaughter, to unleash all that I am on this world. I ready my stance. Are you ready to play with me, I ask the people. After no answer the voice from the shadows tells me to begin.

And so I do.......

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