Its Not Me, Its You

I dropped fourty cards face up on the floor of my apartment
The universe finally favours me again
Granting divine interception
So I can breathe easier
Thank you.

Difficulties
With you and me.
Because of these differences between us
You like wedges
I like chips
You dwell on angels with false prophesies
Promising emotional freedom
I linger in the hell space of my own imaginings
Appreciating truth in suffering
And loss
Much preferring grief at the cost of my own chained freedom
Than let loose in blissful ignorance
I am selfish. And arrogant in believing my pain grants me power over others.
Stronger, better, wiser.
presumptuous in thinking I know best.

For a while there,
I was worried it was my thinking
that made me wrong
When all it happened to be
Was the wheel of life spinning in spite of my favor.
My seriousness makes me a warrior
Are you really strong enough?

You were a just a neutral chain link.
Your thinking made me the enemy.

For someone so 'above' this physical realm
You still gossip
And betray your friends
You oversalt your food

Perhaps I should try to be nicer to your ego.
Perhaps I should shrink my world to make you comfortable.
Perhaps.

Never mind.

by Nicola Thoner

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