MA (August 3,2000 / Centerville)

Jessica B....

She was my best friend for a little while.... she told me she wanted me
but she had three other girls in mind
so she told me to wait a bit while she tries the other before she's completely loyal to me
Mean while the first girl was around she found time to hang around me
by the time the second girl came around I was growing fond of Jess I saw her as my close friend by then
when the third girls turn came up…. I was practically on my heals and toes for her you might have even called it… love
as about 5 months pass I'm still waiting for my turnlike a goodfriend would
then she decided to retry the first girl
it started to hurt watching Jess be all love dovie with another girl so… I got tired of waiting so I considered a new guy in my inbox
after he asked me out I wanted to be polite and ask Jess first so the nextday
she sat with me and finally asked me out but I couldn't bare to lose her over a bad break up… so I said no then I asked her if I can date the new guy
she seemed upset but she said yea whatever
but come to find out the new guy wasn't new at all… he was her God brother
so the next day I asked her if she was mad she told me that she was and then never talked to me since
she claimed she hated me because I went back to guys
but I never said I was going full gay
so I think its deeper than that because her firstgirl was bisexual like me
ever since then she transferred to another school and I'm about to graduate
I been having dreams about her since though…. I had one last night in this one she forgave me… just like in the other on ones….but whyam I in the wrong…. I'm the one that waited for her when she asked… today is Christmas…. I hate Christmas because everyone gets to be with the family but me and my mom….. we two are the only family we'vegot…. and barely even that…. I text Jess Merry Christmas even though I told her I'd leave her alone…. I don't have dreams about people for no reason…. its apart of my gift…. we don't have to date… I justwant my best friend back… but who am I kiddingI'm about to be an adult…. my high school days will fade and if she doesn't come back…. I will forget about Jessica B……

by MyIner Agony

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