I lost something.
by kendyll brown
A very important part of me.
The worst part is that I probably never had it.
He came into my life a cool breeze.
Everyone knows that you can't catch air.
But I'm a fool and yes I tried.
And just when I thought I had him,
he slipped right through my fingers.
If I close my eyes
I can still feel his arms around me.
Grabbing his hand and pointing
Feel his breath on my neck,
his body calming my cold shivers.
I replay that moment every time I blink.
I heard him tell me to open my heart.
I felt him open his.
And for the first time in a long time,
I felt safe.
Every fear that I had.
Every insecurity vanished when he told me that he loved me.
The moment only magnified,
I could hear the fish swim in the river below.
I could see the fragment of glass on the moon and everything went silent.
So quiet that you could hear my breathless response.
I wanted to cry.
I wanted to reach up and slap God high five.
But then like air- it disappeared.
His breathing got heavy.
I saw flickers in his eyes
within a couple of seconds my world came crashing down.
His confessions cut me like glass.
And even though his thoughts hadn't become actions,
I couldn't help but feel like I had lost him.
It hurt so bad.
He turned the tables on me with his swiftness.
Made me feel as though I had committed the ultimate crime.
And what did I do?
I let him.
He made my eyes melt.
Made my ears bleed.
Made my heart ache.
And just like a cool sudden breeze- he was gone.
He removed a pebble from my foundation
collapsed the greatest pyramid in Egypt.
And after the dust cleared,
and the air had returned to it's resting stage.
I was left in ruins.
Like air- I was gone.