Mary Toodle-Pip

Mary slammed her old phone down with a bang.
Her neatly-pressed gingham dress swirled and shook
As she whirled around, 'DANG! '
'The Mobile Home Ombudsman is not in, ' 'The schnook! '

'Always the same. They think they can ignore me? '
She laced her boots and jammed on her red hat.
Her thin, angular body quivered. 'We'll see.
I'm going to the state capitol. DRAT! '

The train rattled and whistled all the while.
It puffed and snorted, and so did Mary,
Angrily clutching her mobile home file.
'My tax pays his salary. Glory be! '

When she arrived, she plopped down in a taxi.
'I'm sorry lady, I'm waiting for my fare.'
' You just got a fare to the capitol! '
He started up when he saw her glare.

There, a beautiful well-groomed receptionist
said, 'I'm sorry, he is not in today, '
while daintily drooping her well-shaped wrist.
'Or any day, ' Mary snapped, 'if I may say.'

'It's lunchtime, ' the lady said, and she left.
No one was around. Mary opened his door.
In the dark, he was sleeping at his desk.
She touched him. 'Now see here! ' He fell to the floor.

'He's dead, ' she thought. 'And nobody missed him!
No wonder he never answered my calls.'
She heard the recording, ' not in...'
Mary didn't know if she should laugh or bawl!

She dug out a votive candle she once bought.
She lit it, and placed it by his head.
From her hat, she plucked a flower. It caught
The candle's flicker. He seemed asleep in bed.

She taped a large poster board to his door:
Elegy to a Mobile Home Ombudsman
Sleep in peace, my dear man.
We'll all get on a best we can.

PS To the staff, if you please,
SOME ONE send my mobile
home registration to me!

by Mary Naylor

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