Hey dad look at me, think back and talk to me did I grow up according to plan or did I falter all the way down?
by Chantelle Clark
I try so hard to do as you say, I try to be your good little girl but I'm not meant to be. That good little girl is my sis, you love her so, she doesn't seem to miss. You used to be my hero, the one and only but all I am to you it seems is a relationship between father and daughter gone amiss.
Evertime were in a room together its so tense. I can't seem to make you proud from what I see. I've grown up and through the years I've changed. I was always told to try harder and as I did nothing happened. Nothings going to change the things you've said. Nothings going to make this work again! You always say you don't want to talk about our relationship, because you've done it too many times before. So therefore we don't talk at all. I guess not talking is better then fighting because fighting involves physical abuse but silence brings mental challenges too! So what now?
You don't understand, don't turn your back. Please don't walk away and leave me feeling like it's all my fault. It is not all my fault, I've tried to communicate but I grew up with all of this so I don't know how to make my voice heard! I'm tired of crying about this, I'm tired of trying and getting nowhere! We lost it all I know this after nine years of trying to establish anything at all! Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter. I'm surprised to have any days left now, I'm tired trying, I'm tired of crying, I know I've been smiling but inside I'm dying. Face away and pretend that I'm not but I'll be here cause your all that I've got! I'll journey again down Memory Lane one last time til the end.