SA (12/13/1989 / )

Mistakes (Written At The Beginning Of My H.S. Senior Year,2007)

Whoever said that hindsight is twenty-twenty,
I would say was a fairly wise man.
It’s too bad that he forgot the directions,
On how to make the best of it while you can.

The importance of looking ahead,
Helps to fade the regrets of the past.
It’s such a waste to look behind,
At the kind of person you don’t want to last.

Today, the haze as finally lifted,
And I can see the road that’s leading my way.
Full of curves and challenges,
But it’s a direction I can respect at the end of the day.

I pray I won’t lose my direction,
I have found home again right here.
Living with the lessons,
That are apparent now, my eighteenth year.

I have learned that the present,
Will be your past, wrong or right.
You cannot erase the mistakes,
That criticize your mind at night.

[It’s fun to think that what you do now will just enthusiastically go away the next day. It’s ironic that the day you want that innocence and that clean slate back, it’s at that moment that you realize that it is gone. Your decisions will catch up with you and leave you with nothing but regrets and yourself to face. Realize that before you make them.]

I now know that time,
Has a cruel way of playing with my heart.
The hard times last too damn long,
And the good, you can never bring back to the start.

[Decide what you want out of these years. It’s over-rated to say that you want memories of nights you were incapable of remembering. When you wake up one day and experience real things like true friendship, teamwork, and excellence, the time you have left to reach your goals will inevitably fly by and out of your grip.]

I found out that people,
Who claim that they will be there through every bump and bend,
Have no right to make YOUR decisions,
Because they won’t be the one picking up your pieces in the end.

[Certain people have a way of blocking your morals for a night, year, a lifetime. They make you feel like it’s okay to get off track because they are there too. If you follow someone off track, you will find that you’re left with the hard battle of breaking free and finding your own way back. Be who you are and who you want to end up as in this life. That’s exactly what you’ll have in the end, nothing more, nothing less.]

It now hurts to know,
That all of my “firsts” only happen a single time.
Settling for anyone, anything,
Denies the possibility of what’s out there to find.

[Some decisions don’t seem like big ones, and it appears that it’s okay to be wrong. Then one day you realize that it was actually one of the big ones that, even if you see it right, now you cannot go back and make it right. You can’t know that it is right if you haven’t found what is wrong. Recognize the wrong ones and hold out until you know what is right, because when it is, you’ll know.]

I have re-formed the ties,
With the ones I foolishly pushed away.
All along they were the support,
That will now and forever be in my life to stay.

[Your parents are going to seem wrong and completely “uncool” to you, but if they are anything like mine appear to me now, you will someday realize that they knew exactly how to get you through the times that you deliberately left them out of. This is a lesson that most teenagers learn a few years too late. Be different, and don’t make that mistake. Don’t take your parents for granted or assume that they don’t know what they’re talking about. They just might surprise you with how much they actually do know.]

I realize the importance now,
Of finding and following the right tracks.
While at the same time making your own,
To develop knowledge to avoid the cracks.

[You can depend on others for so long and for so much…and then independence and responsibility must be established within yourself. Growing up is a hard-learned skill and a subject that you will be tested on for everyday of the rest of your life. The world will push, will you push back? You will find the support you need for the journey only after you find yourself.]

I feel now that confidence,
Is much easier said than done.
And to have the wisdom to stand up,
For your own beliefs, your only # 1.

[There is no excuse for sparing your own morals for anyone or any situation. Confidence in yourself and your own beliefs will earn you respect and the courage to keep the will to stay true to yourself. It’s the mirror that you have to face at the end of the day, and it doesn’t lie.]

I recall now on my mentality,
Have fun until I forget.
That doesn’t have to be the way for me,
Young didn’t have to be a regret.

[It’s not necessarily normal to be young and dumb. Choose to be young and smart. You’ll thank yourself later when all those people who criticized you eventually become envious of what you did for yourself.]

So many days I didn’t recognize,
The person I was back then.
I now see an entirely different person,
Who is ashamed to remember back again.

[Strive to never have to look at yourself and not recognize the person looking back. It’s a terrifying feeling.]

Now I am here.
From all of that, I’ve set myself free.
A future that might ease my pain,
And lead my soul back inside of me.

I will use my memories of weakness,
As ghosts that give me strength to keep going,
Lessons that help me see clearly,
Help me to never stop learning, never stop growing.

I can be proud of where I am at.
I can release myself from my own hate.
But now with my eyes open,
I can see that I’m sadly, three years too late…

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Comments (2)

great poem...thank you
beautiful, i love it. thanks.