My Big Brother

I love my brother; that's always been true
From the time I was little to this very day
But for a long time our close moments had been few
More my fault than his, I'm sorry to say.

Growing up together, we fought too often
As brothers are known to do
But once in a while our hearts would soften
And our love for each other would flow as new.

He became a teen and I felt him drifting away
Or so it seemed, since I was his younger brother
But unbeknown to him, I still looked up to him, every day
Although quite often, all we had in common was our father and mother.

He was my older brother; secretly I admired him so
I wanted to be like him; do all the things he did
But of course I couldn't tell him or let him know
How I felt; my feelings toward him I hid.

During my teenage years we really drifted apart
We marched to different drummers; he went his way and I went mine
He was older and started making his mark
Whereas for me, I just grew wild, and wasn't very kind.

Eventually he found a good woman, got married and settled down
He had two boys, and his life looked bright
As for me, I was still very lost; no true happiness was found
And our relationship with each other still wasn't right.

Only once in a while would I take the time
To go and visit my brother and his wife
But even when I did, our relationship seemed benign
I didn't try to reach him; I thought, 'Oh well, that's life'.

His accomplishments in this life have well impressed me
And it seems his talents knew no bounds
He's more knowledgeable than I; that I can see
Compared to him, I felt my talents were just now being found.

Then our Mother passed away, and there appeared a crack
In the wall we built around our true feelings
The relationship we once shared was starting to come back
Ever so slowly but I could feel it healing.

Since that time, we have grown closer still
But another sad time was soon to follow
We lost our father, too and we both grew ill
Life has given us very bitter pills to swallow.

Each of us deals with our sorrows in our own way
But now our relationship is open even more
I found God, and became a Christian, I'm proud to say
And now I pray my brother, too, will open Jesus' door.

Let me end here, if I may
I love my brother; that's always been so
From the time I was little to this very day
My secret and true feelings I now let him know.
I love you, Harold.

by Rick Harris

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