CS (19-06-1969 / Adelaide - Australia)

My Garden Of Life

Walking slowly through my garden of life -
I stop - to take in all that surrounds my senses.
I close my eyes - and feel the warmth of the sun.
I reflect - on times gone by, and moments yet to come.
It is the fragrances and sounds that create the amazing -
Familiar memories held safely within this place of mine.

A new beginning suddenly seems to appear out of nowhere.
I turn to look behind at where I have just been,
The steps I have taken now have become so clear and final,
The path has turned I am headed toward an unknown place
Full of new stories and hidden secrets yet to be revealed.

I let my mind drift away - back to a significant place in time
To a day spent crying in a hidden part of my garden,
This is the place I call my secret garden of life.
It was in this part of my garden I lost the one I loved,
It was the day he chose to continue his walk in life -
In a direction that turned him away from - our path,
The one we once believed we would share together - always.

This is where we said our goodbyes - he walked away-
I watched him leave - he disappeared into the distance.
The tears that fell from my eyes – flooded my vision
I lost a part of myself that day, along with my heart.
I made a choice – I would never return to this place,
Our sacred place – this was our secret garden.

One day while walking, I found myself amongst the
Weeds and overgrowth unable to now find my way out
Captured within the depths of this lush, thriving space.
I became very scared and confused - I had lost my way.
I closed my eyes, and allowed my senses to guide me.
I began to hear, and feel moments that became familiar,
Emotions began to shower over me and fill me with warmth- I knew from that moment - this was my secret garden.

I opened my eyes - the first thing I saw deep within -
The overgrowth was a spot of bright yellow – it was golden.
As the sun broke through the treetops - a single ray of light
Captured this new beginning trying to reach for the warmth.
I realized then - that this was a gift, and that I had been blinded by my own consuming sadness and loss
When right in front of me all along was this strength.
A strength that was here to show me all is not lost.
I began to clear the weeds that grew around this beginning
Trying to strangle and suffocate its growth and beauty.
This precious new gift was given to me to as a sign of hope.

That was the first day I could see what I had in my life
I had been so blinded – and it was right there before me.
It was you my beautiful friend – from the very first day you
Entered my garden of life you have always been a bright happy new beginning – lost and trying to grow in amongst
So much darkness – until the day I saw you smiling
Within your smile I saw – new beginnings – a new journey.

In the depths of your eyes I saw your soul - so full of
Sadness and uncertainty but with an abundance of love,
Your heart is so full of kindness, warmth and care.
I could see your inner glow - shining all around you.
From that day you became so much more to me than family
This was the day you became my treasured friend.

When I look beside me today I see no one else but you,
There is no one else within my garden of life my friend.
I would not choose to share this very moment or this
Part of my journey with anyone but you.
Thank you for being beside me so I don’t walk alone.
Your friendship is so much more than you will ever know.

December 2005
For Chelsi x


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