My Reading Glasses Won'T Read

It was a cold day
I shivered up my spine.
I was standing at the podium
When my sight just went away
I felt I was going blind.

A good friend later told me
Not to be dismayed.
Just go buy yourself
Some Reading Glasses
And then your sight
Will certainly be saved.

I went to every store
I tried on every pair.
To give myself satisfaction
To stop me from squinting
And wonderng around
With this big, deep, blank stare.

I found the perfect pair
I thought I looked real fine.
But I could not imagine
Why they woudn't read
They said Reading Glasses on the tag
It was right there first line.

I commanded those glasses
To be bold
To go ahead and read.
I even put them in my pocket
In case of stage fright
So then maybe they would proceed.

I carried them when I spoke
I laid them by the book.
I even carried them to school
And still not a word.
Man I tell you,
These glasses were low down and cruel.

I later told a friend
Just what I was going to do.
And that was to take these glasses
Right back where I'd gotten them
To the store
That tried to make me out a fool.

by Cecelia Weir

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