There's another gorn to glory!
by Geoffrey Anketell Studdert Kennedy
Damn and blast these blinkin' 'Uns!
Where's our damn retaliation?
What's the matter wiv the guns?
If they'd only give 'em rations
Same as they keeps givin' us,
They'd soon stop their bloomin' antics —
Gawd, it makes a fellah cuss.
One by one I sees 'em goin’
All the gamest and the best,
One by one they keeps on goin’,
There's another lad gorn west.
I suppose there's no munitions.
Got to save up for a spell.
While they does their blarsted savin',
My platoon gets blowed to 'ell.
Damn these blame munition workers,
Damn them and their bloomin' strike,
Thinks it's same as Peace conditions,
They can do just as they like.
Think o' Jimmy Brown! 'E's earnin'
Easy four pun ten a week,
And 'e's struck for better money -
'E's the one as oughter speak-
Been and bought a noo pianer,
And 'is wife a noo fur coat,
Gawd, I 'opes 'is Sunday dinner
Stops and turns round in 'is throat.
'Ow'd 'e like these blarsted trenches,
'Ow'd 'e like this cussed mud,
'Ow'd 'e like 'is Sunday dinner
From a dicksee stained wiv blood,
'Ow'd 'e like to sit and eat it
Next an 'arf unburied Fritz,
Wiv a smell that turns your stummick
As ye eats a bite and spits?
Better money! Gawd Almighty!
Give us sporting charnce ov life.
I don't arsk for better money,
Gimme leave to see my wife.
She don't want no noo pianer,
All she wants is me come 'ome,
If there's no retaliation,
All I gets is kingdom come.
Better money -better money,
Gawd, it makes a fellah sick,
All they thinks abaht is money,
And they makes it too damn quick.
But it's rotten bloody money,
Oughter rob 'em of their sleep,
They're just buyin' British bodies,
Buyin' tears what women weep.
Don't I wish I 'ad 'em 'ere now,
I'd soon teach 'em what is what,
They'd soon strike for better money,
This 'ud touch 'em on the spot.
All the blokes what's on moonitions
Oughter come 'ere for a spell,
All them dudes what's profiteerin'
Oughter be out 'ere - in 'ell.
Gawd, the blighters couldn't do it,
If they damn well only knew,
But they don't - they won't believe it,
They don't think that war is true.