Peeing In The Sink

With heavy heart I do admit
I pee (but never ever shit)
into the sink, but just at home.
Occasionally I hit the comb
and once, the toothbrush got a sprinkle.

My spouse, she hates it when I tinkle
not in the gadget called a throne
I do it only when alone
and, let me tell you why she fumes
no wild contortions she assumes
she simply cannot reach that height
though once I saw her when she tried.

I did suggest she use a tube
or stand on a large Rubik's cube
but even pressed against the ledge
what's missing was the leading edge!
Now I would never use my tassle
in such a way in someone's castle.

You see, the sink drains into metal
an S-shaped pipe unlike a kettle,
and even half a litre will
not be sufficient here to fill
the lower vertical completely.
Thus, it would sit in there and neatly
release its aromatic fumes
into the hallway and the rooms.

Unless one runs the tap for thirty
or forty seconds, it stays dirty,
and then there is that yellow stain
which shows against the white so plain.

Suspicion grows inside a host
when peeing ought to take at most
a couple minutes and no more....
perhaps he'll listen through the door!

I have, on very rare occasions
used sinks in houses of Caucasians,
but due to my advancing years
and after one too many beers.

I usually just sit and nibble
on snacks but later on a dribble
released by order of a gland
it's the residual, understand (?) ,

keeps coming, taking its sweet time
in men who've lived beyond their prime.
I hope you all have understood
why women would, well...if they could

and men would aim a little higher
(he who denies it is a liar) .
You see we Krauts are fond of saying
there is no use in hoping, praying......

no shaking, tapping, squeezing, willing
can keep the final dropp from spilling.

by Herbert Nehrlich

Comments (2)

Would you sink so low Herbert! ! I feel you might be going down the drain. Ha! Perhaps a cork might be the answer, but I'm sure the relief is worth using this unusual form of recepticle, and or course there is always the convenience of it. It is obviously the right solution to your ablutions. Great write as usual from your pen............! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Love Ernestine XXX
Well Herb you've hit the spot That most don't even think about It's the where and why In the night that makes men cry For you see When at night one takes a pee The light is so much better there Than on the throne like chair Where the decision must be Whether to sit or stand when taking a pee Too much mind work at this time Makes it difficult to hit the target on a dime It's so much easier to just address The sink and relieve yourself from stress And once the flow begins to start (One can even do it in the dark) The satisfaction of knowing that You've mastered with eclat The mission that you came to do Now remember to wash you hands of drippings few And with this mission accomplished, sure You've saved some five gallons of water or more And doing something for the planet's care A green for sure you are How proud you must be That in addition to poetry You've made your statement of how it goes When the urine begins to floe. s