Scrooge's Number One Fan!
What, me? On Summer holiday? Take time off, fly abroad?
by Denis Martindale
Passport renewed, then on my way! Sunshine as my reward?
Romance, perhaps and clubbing late! Cocktails with umbrellas?
Find true love there, as if by fate, like a million fellas!
Suppose I stay at home instead! I'll have more cash at hand!
Why spend it while I'm on the Med? Love's magic's in each land!
Love works as well in Nottingham, in Birmingham and Bath -
Abroad it's golden glitz and glam and then you tip the staff!
I think I'd rather save my dosh for rainy days at home
Than visit Venice! Oh, my gosh! Or lose it all in Rome!
Call me a skinflint! Miser, too! Call me Ebenezer!
But Scrooge was wise, I'm telling you! Cool dude frugal geezer!
There's bound to be a babe in town to spend a few quid on...
If not, then there's no need to frown! My money won't be gone!
In my old age, when money's tight, I'll have some dosh to spare...
To pay for food, for heat and light and physiotherapy care...