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Seeking Authenticity In The Ersatz World
(July 12,1962 / Moscow, Russia)

Seeking Authenticity In The Ersatz World

Poem By Alexander Shaumyan

When all the messiahs are gone
And all the prophecies come to pass
Out of someone's asshole
Like a fleeting erection,
I just want to leave it all behind -
The love and the passions
The fake kisses and orgasms,
All the pointless trusting and thrusting
In and out, in an out - like some
Dogs in heat copulating for that
Final enlightenment, le petit mort -
I don't want to celebrate anything
Or make prophecies or empty declarations
Of some ideal love -
I just want to embrace my humanness,
My loneliness and separateness
From the world that keeps looking
At its mirror, reveling in its success -
I don't want success or cheap perfumed
Letters and countless 'I love you's -
I don't feel any more special than
A plumber or a postman,
And I too take a shit and a piss once
In a while and have bad morning breath
From an alcohol-dried mouth -
I'm tired of prophets and orgasm-faking
Women, applauding dull poets,
I just want to be free to say whatever
Is on my mind -
Not to impress, woo or seduce,
But to speak my heart to another,
So that there might be a chance that
Someone else feels the same way,
But I have not found it yet -
Authenticity is hard to find these days,
Only the pretentious artifice of the
Language - So let me just be sad
And remember my love for Teresa
The way it once was.


November 23,2005

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