IOI (7/4/1934 / Hebburn.Co Durham U.K)

Staff Welfare? ?

I must insist that you desist.
Your pointless questions I resist.
But you continue to persist.
A typical psychiatrist.

The questions that you ply me with
all appertain to Mr Smith
and to the town of Aberystwith.
This has to cease: right now, forthwith.

I fear you are in error sir
Although you do not want to hear.
I am in fact your manager
and your mistake may cost you dear.

It seems you have your wires crossed
and will not listen, you have lost
the plot. What worries me the most.
You seem to be deaf as a post.

Have you trouble with your hearing
Or have you merely lost your bearings.
A psychiatrist should be caring
I find your attitude is wearing

away at my patience.
I’m fast losing confidence
in your ability to sense
what is bothering your patients.

I think perhaps it would be best
if you were forced to take a rest.
This is an order, no request
It seems that you are deeply stressed.

I will arrange cover for you.
That is the least that I can do.
This is the course I must pursue
You understand of course you do.

Although you are a little mad
at present you are not too bad.
There is no reason to be sad
you’ll get the rest you haven’t had

You must take all the time you need
I am so glad that you’ve agreed
Just rest relax and perhaps read
and soon you will be up to speed

Your job will still be here for you.
When we are sure you’re able to
do your work as you used to.
Good therapists are far too few.

We can’t afford to let you go.
You are one of the best, I know
your suspension comes as a blow
But you must learn to take it slow.

I can state clearly you’ll be missed
a senior staff psychiatrist.
Not just a number on some list
So be a good chap don’t resist.

You know I have the power to
recommend that we sack you.
Something I do not want to do
You must believe that it is true.

So ends an awkward interview
I have done all that I could do.
Of course it’s subject to review
By the bosses I report to.

They may think I was incorrect.
An outcome that I don’t expect
I think I have earned their respect
I’m sure they’ll ask me to select.

A locum who will work for less
but who can stand up to the stress.
I have no choice but to confess
the systems in a dreadful mess.

It’s pointless voicing a complaint
We are under such constraint.
You need the patience of a saint.
And that is something which I aint

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User Rating: 5 / 5 ( 0 votes ) 1

Maya Angelou

Caged Bird

Comments (1)

A very thorough treatment of this serious situation. Despite the seriousness I found it quite amusing and hilarious at times. Well done.