Suicidal Tendencies

I fell down a hole in my own mind
trying to dig for happy memories that i couldn't find
feel and hit the bottom of my thoughts hard
got more fucked up and ended up scarred

looking around in the dark abyss of my thoughts
saw things that i long ago forgot
things that when i'm happy they disappear
but when i'm on my knees crying they decide to reappear

you see its easy to cover up my dilusiones
make people believe certain things causing confusion
its an intrusion how these thoughts cloud my mind like pollution
making me want to kill myself but that won't be my conclusion

looking back at all the stages in my life
that left me scared and unprepared have me looking at the knife
pen and paper is the only salvation that i have
writing poems that cause tears all on my behalf

writing stanzas, versus and choruses for songs
and a sad melody just to go along
for the pain filled words that surround my soul
to see if some how some day i can crawl out of that hole! ! !

by Aledra Rodriguez

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Comments (1)

I can really relate to this poem...although more as a memory..... I love the emotion in it, this sadness, but hope....So true about the writing...Really good work....