! The Girl Who Was A Waiter

'We never care for the present moment. We are so foolish that we wander in times that are not ours, and never think of the only time that belongs to us; we are so frivolous that we dream of the days that are not, and thoughtlessly pass over the only one that exists. We never live, but hope to live; and since we are always preparing to be happy it is inevitable that we shall never be so.'

- Blaise Pascal
(1623 - 1662)
French philosopher and mathematician

Not a waitress; just a waiter.
Though she sees herself as
a planner; a Girl With Plans.

Mid-January; travel brochures
all over the sofa; and not decided yet.
But it’s just such fun – she’s been like that
since she was a little girl – the future’s always
golden, shining, full of possibility…
the present simply doesn’t compare..

She’ll take an early holiday this year; and then,
a whole summer of café tables, clubs;
she, tanned and glowing, sharp eyes skinned
for – no, not Mr Right – that’s silly chick-mag stuff.. but
a Truly Meaningful Relationship…
oh she just can’t wait. Though wait she will.

Then, it will all fall into place; glowing
with life, she’ll get that new job
which must be waiting for the glowing her, and with
more money, then that sure success which she knows
is just waiting in her to surge out;
feeling that good, how could people
miss the potential sparkling dormant there?

She’s in good shape for a girl
in her late 30s; and what is that these days?
She doesn’t throw herself at men, more
than a girl looking for a TMR has to do;
looks them long and straight between the eyes,
letting them know that here they’ve met
a Girl With Plans; and that, soon
sorts them out..

Time to look at those brochures again;
she just can’t wait to begin to live;
until then, what to do but wait?

Her much-loved cat is wiser in its way than she:
living only in the present, and well content with that;
while she just waits her life away.

[based on a character-sketch from Ernst Tolle’s ‘The Power of Now’]

by Michael Shepherd

Comments (2)

You been reading my diary from a wee while ago M? Brilliant. Simply brilliant. I'm going to treasure this one. Someone wise wrote to me this morning (Hello Will) something along the lines of, are you going to dwell in the past and the what-ifs or discard that and look towards a real wonderful future that starts NOW.... (with my own very real Mr Right....) - yep. Brilliant. t xxx
an interesting read, michael.... i haven't read tolle but i guess there are lots of these 'waiters' about, living a dream yet to become reality... i wonder how she will view life when in her 70's? .. thank you for a thought-provoking read... rachael