The Indefinite Boy

Here I stand upon the brink
Biting broken nails
If I stand to long and think
The last ship will set sail

The world will never stop and wait
For one lost child who will not wake
Her eyes stay shut she shall not hear
Beautiful way to start the year
I want to be there with you now
But fearful folly-confounding doubt
Crash landing in my knife edge mind
The world is gone without you dear
I’m caught between, neither there nor here

And my own self I can’t define
My life is edged by faded lines
Be patriot proud, confidence aloud?
Be modern son, of the modern world?
Am I what my ancestors made me?
Or would they even recognise me?
We empty vessel, frantic youth
Cannot find our own truth
No identity, but an age name and picture
The world is ice, scorn, black and shiver

And so I turn now from the brink
The self I am is simply me
It must be so, or so I think
I am a sailor, on the open sea

by Sam Speirs

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