SF (June 17 1942 / Troy New York)

The Kinds Of Longing I Had Once And The Kinds Of Missing

THE KINDS OF LONGINGS I HAD ONCE AND THE KINDS OF MISSING


The kinds of longings I had once
And the kinds of missing
Are no longer mine-
Love and the pain of love
Desire for her which could drive me insane
Wondering how I could live
If she would not let me touch her
Wondering how I could be in this world
If she would not want to be with me-
All that pain and all that beauty
All that being so intensely alive
Is not where I can be anymore-

The kind of love a young man feels
I will never feel again-
And while there is sadness in the absence,
There is also the sense
That I no longer know what it is I was
When I loved her so so much
I could not even begin to think of my life without her.

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