Yellow Tresses And The Joke Of Rain

Sad girl
in the sunshower
with locks of yarn beading
with lolligagging drops of rain
like drooling tentacles
as if squeamish clouds had dumped diamonds into your flaxen jungle- wet with silver- for jollies

by Luke J. Holt

Comments (6)

The adjectives, especially when hyphenated, are excessive, I find eg 'daylight's dapple- dawn-drawn falcon'. I do not rate this poem highly, as I used to.
a useful poem for this useless world thanks
Diction gives its a dimension of another rhyming spirit to catch by aggressive passion which stretches the reader from known to abstract. So it is nice. Numbers used within lines are moderate use as it happens at random in mobile messaging.
Sorry, but this poem just doesn't do anything for me, and what is the numeral 5 doing at the end of line 5?
This has been my favorite poem for over 30 years and this phrase: “in his riding / Of the rolling level underneath him steady air, ” gives me deep-seated physical and emotional pleasure every time I read it, without fail.
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