Trumpets, Part 2
I found out I had it wrong the other day when
I talked about Jesus playing the trumpet on
Judgment Day. Someone told me that he
won’t be doing that and that other folks will
handle the trumpet chores.
Actually, what’s more likely is that the
trumpet-players will be invisible and you’ll
just sort of hear the sound everywhere,
magically coming out of the sky like jet
engines. There might be some really loud
choral voices too, likewise coming out of the
sky from invisible singers (mainly sopranos) .
Everyone will suddenly stop doing whatever
they were doing. They’ll dropp their brooms in
mid-sweep. Cars will drive up onto the curb,
and maybe bump into a tree or a trashcan.
Lovers will stop kissing (sinning) . And
everyone will look around going, “What the
hell is that sound? ” Actually, the correct
phrasing is that they’ll gaze upwards in
wonderment and awe.
Then Jesus will make his dramatic entrance.
Somehow, everyone in the world will be able
to see him - I haven’t figured out how that’s
going to work. But what I was wondering is
what will Jesus be wearing? I mean, this is
going to be a huge Las Vegas-style spectacle
so I hope he won’t be wearing that same old
dirty smock. That is so First Century. I mean,
he doesn’t have to wear Armani or Hugo
Boss, but I can just see someone saying to
him, “Update your wardrobe, dude.” That
would be impolite, of course, but I imagine a
lot of people will be thinking that very thing.