SF (15/4/90 / dampier)


why is it that all the dead heads come in to ED at 3am? ?
why cant we give them a diagnosis of 'Too Stupid To Live'
surely there should be an ICD-9/ DSM criterion for these people.
That blue growth from your navel is not a cancer you moron,
its lint! and youre Too Stupid To Live.
Im sorry,
it appears that your 3 casks of wine have not been poisoned
with anything other than alcohol! ! !
you idiot...youre Too Stupid To Live.
Im sure you dont know how that motorcycle spring / light bulb/ potato/ purple intruder,
got up your anus,
perhaps thats because youre Too Stupid To Live! !
feeling sick
because you siphoned the septic tank
and not the petrol tank from a mobile home,
well youre Too Stupid To Live!
For anyone that has seen this type of patient at 3am
and sent them home
wishing there was a more appropriate diagnosis for the discharge,
or for anyone who needs a more definitive diagnosis
but cant find one in the DSM,
to have the diagnosis of Too Stupid To Live
become an essential part of the medical dictionaries
and share a few of your stories while youre at it.

by simi faey

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