When In Control

i cant let go of him oh trust me i tried
i dont know how to and it's hurt
it's been two fucking years
excuse me for my swearing
damn it i just want to get rid of you
why cant i
i am obsessing over someone i cant have
how pitiful can a person get
i wont relieve his name
though it wouldnt even matter because the chances are that he would never see this
i need to let go and i dont know where to start
damn it why are you in my head
dont you think it's time to leave already
i recovered from my wounds but you're in my presence
you mostly likely wont remember me
and still i have dreams of talking to you again
as if it would one day turn into a reality
and everything would come to place
but i know it's false
and again im obessing over you
as if i would see you again
even if i saw u i wouldnt know what to say
and i know - deep inside i know - that i wont see you
i should had stayed when i had the chance
oh only if you could see me now
if i had stayed only god knows what would have happen to me
i need to recover from my wounds
a part of me wanted to stay
becuase i believe that maybe there was a chance
but the person i was then was bruise
you wouldnt want to be around that kind of person
but why would you go after someone who step over you
played with your head like a spider taunting its prey
i have to admit you deserve better
everyone deserves better
two years ago i hope that i was that better person for you
and i know that sounds girlish or silly
but now as i look forward in life you found your way back in my mind
i dont know why - maybe its a sign
im just tired of waiting for it to show itself

by timelia tison

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