You Are So Far Away

You are so far away, I say,
My life is an empty cage
Inside which they put me into last night-
An empty room, an empty space,
An empty heart and a forbidden soul-
Grabbed by my limbs, Kicking and screaming?
All I could hear were the tears my own despair,
It only matters that they brought me to this prison last night- and
The only light I see is creeping through the crack
Of a locked door and reflecting against the
Aluminum strap of my restraints- You are so far away-
You, my family deceased as of nineteen years,
You, my home in my solitude-
You, what was left of my sanity? I scream to be set free,
I beg to be let out of this tenement of my suffering-
Nobody hears my cries- Silent or loud and desperate,
I call myself a wild animal, fearful of human assassins,
None but a helpless child not knowing right from wrong.
The key to this door that I am locked behind,
Within my state of terror and the indifference of this
Cruel and mindless world,
I am a child who has never known her mother's love and
Who never learned to run from the confinement of the hell into which I was born?
I stand upon the peak of a phantasmal mountain
Looking down upon a river in which I could drown
If I were to jump-inside the world of my dreams
I would like to jump and swim the length of this river below
Until I return to the solitary universe I had once created for myself-
And the people I have created inside my own mind and right now
I speak to you, these people- 'You are so far away, ' and
I have begun to realize that my life has been none but a glorified delusion-
Please set me free from this suicidal prison- set me free from
These devilish beings tampering with my mind,
Has the horrific day now come to lock me away forever?
No one can hear my desperate cries,
I am a lost spirit on the verge of emotional death-
Who is to be snatched away from all that is real-?
I have never been heard because in so many misunderstood ways,
I have been deemed to be none but a wounded soul whose thoughts are so far away
From anything real and only I can only live inside the world of my dreams which is to
Everyone else is too far away to reach? And my voice-too far away to be heard?

by Claudia Krizay

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