SS (4/15/1990 / albany, ny)

Why I Can'T Let Go

Sometimes I ask myself,
What am I even thinking of?
Why do I do these things,
And act like this is love?

Why do I let him touch me?
Why do I ask for more?
I know that I don't love him,
Yet I cant walk out that door.

Why do I stay behind,
After all the hurt he's put me through?
When he tells me he loves me,
Why do I lie and say I love him too?

Is it because I've become accustomed?
Or because I'm scared of being alone?
I thought that I could love you,
But I find my feelings haven't grown.

So why then cant I just leave?
Just turn and walk away.
Why do I kiss him every morning,
And wish him a very good day?

In reality I don't care,
If I have no love to give.
But I play along in this world,
It's the only way I know how to live.

I stay because I'm used to it.
Nothing more, nothing less.
I know nothing else but this,
Even though I know its not the best.

His arms are my shelter,
Yet I feel no warmth
His touch is reassuring,
Yet I feel no passion.

He is my lover,
Yet not the love of my life.
He'll always be there,
Yet I'll never be his wife.

Why I do what I do,
Maybe I'll never know...
All I know is I'm not happy,
But I just cant let go...

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Comments (1)

Sometimes we just settle into that which is familiar... the unknown away from that is way too hard to consider.... I think we all at some time settle for almost rather than adventuring out for perfect.... Nice write... Alison